Valentine’s Day: Why we love it, and why we don’t
by Laetitia Wong
“Baby, if you love me, you’d have gotten me the bigger bouquet of flowers we saw the other day!”
“Do you know the teddy bear her boyfriend gave her is life-sized? It’s so much bigger than mine!”
“Are these real diamonds?”
“Seriously we’re going to that restaurant? You’re so cheap!”
Omitting the atrocious grammatical errors, singlish slang and high-pitched whine, you’ve basically got a rough idea of how Valentine’s Day usually goes for most couples.
You’d be surprised; These examples weren’t wild concoctions that I invented while attempting to live vicariously through Mindy Kalling, but rather actual conversations that I happened to overhear while waiting for the MRT, girls gossiping across toilet stalls, to their boyfriends while slapping their arms ‘playfully’ etc. You get the idea. And no, I’m not nosy, just particularly receptive.
Truthfully, I haven’t got a clue how that particular gelled-up dude managed to resist the temptation of pushing his pencil-sized lady love into the MRT tracks, but I certainly had to turn up the volume on my iPod to curb the urge of yanking out her extensions right there on the spot.
Still, is Valentine’s Day all that bad?
Sure, it isn’t all that’s cut out to be – Between Sam Smith’s crooning Stay With Me and Taylor Swift’s Blank Space, along with the violent shades of red, over-sized teddy bears and conversation chocolate hearts – The patience is running low, folks.
The history of the day rests in the immortal legacy of the dedicated Saint Valentine, a Roman saint who was persecuted for performing weddings for soldiers who were forbidden to marry.
With all that said, what are we left with?
1. There can be no better time to proclaim your undying love to your partner without being judged (more than one would usually be judged on an average day)
2. It’s adorable when your kid comes back from pre-school wielding a shaky drawing of ‘Happy Vaalentime’s Day Mummy” and insist you stick it up on the top of the fridge. #thefeels
3. It’s a great excuse to get dolled up and break out that fresh pack of Spanx you got at Isetan while it was half-off.
4. It’s a great moment for all singletons in the world to celebrate a pity-marathon with their single girlfriends. You can beat a Gossip Girl marathon, pizza, and loud proclamations that all men are pigs. (With the exception of Ben and Jerry)
5. It’s the one day out of the other 365 that you get to celebrate love – It’s sweet, let’s leave it at that.
1. Pink and red make for the worst kind of blindness-inducing colour combinations ever.
2. Chocolate gifts are usually wrapped with tacky pink and red foil, and taste of chalk and artificial sweeteners. Bye, bye, summer body!
3. I’m not sure how you feel about receiving random gifts from strangers who leave letters and melted chocolates in your mailbox, but that spells one thing: Creepy.
4. My condolences go out to whomever got proposed to on Valentine’s Day. Who’d want to share their anniversary with a bajillion other people?
5. Overpriced everything.
So what about you? What’s the V-day like for you?